Relationship Intensives with Ash Gilmer, MA, LPCC
Ash Gilmer
Mental Health Counselor
Phone: 413-212-9515
There are moments in a relationship when an hour a week just isn’t enough. Moments when everything feels raw, urgent, or deeply stuck – and easing in slowly through weekly couples therapy doesn’t feel right.
As a couples therapist, I deeply value the chance to do intensives with both new and existing clients. There is something uniquely powerful about having a longer stretch of time together – a bigger container that can hold the tenderness, the stuck places, and the vulnerability that naturally come up when we’re working on your relationship.
In intensives, we’re not glancing at the clock, worried about getting cut off just as something important begins to open. We get to settle in and really unpack what’s happening between you, so you can begin to heal or shift things at the roots.
We look beneath the surface of conflicts or disconnection to understand the deeper dynamics at play – why you keep getting caught in the same painful cycles, and what keeps fueling them. You’ll leave with a clearer understanding of what’s happening in your relationship, and what’s needed to create change.
You’ll also leave with practical tools and skills to help you communicate more effectively, understand each other more deeply, and navigate challenges together in a new way. We won’t just talk about these tools – you’ll get hands-on practice using them with each other, with my guidance and support, so they feel real and usable when you go back into your daily life.
And you’ll leave with a roadmap: clarity about what comes next and how to keep building on what you’ve started, whether that’s continuing therapy, integrating these changes on your own, or making other important decisions for your relationship.
Often, the ground we cover in an intensive would take months to reach in weekly therapy
About Ash
I am a 35-year-old queer, white, transgender male from Chapel Hill, NC. I feel most at home when immersed in nature and I love to hike and spend time with my loved ones.
My Approach
Clients consistently tell me they feel deeply supported in our work together. My style is warm, collaborative, and down-to-earth. I’m firmly on the side of both partners, helping each of you feel understood and cared for. At the same time, I bring clear guidance and structure to help you find understanding and make meaningful changes. My approach blends gentleness with direction, creating a safe space where you can feel held while also moving forward in new and more fulfilling ways.
I use the Developmental Model, the Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy (PACT Level-II), Relateful (CE-Level II), and my masters-level training in Somatic Counseling from Naropa University. As a somatic and social justice -oriented therapist, I am trained to include the body in therapy and believe it is important to be aware of how cultural and systemic factors are at play in the issues at hand. As a trans male therapist, I find that I can relate with both the woman and the man in straight couples and also cherish working with queer clients.
Who are intensives for?
When everything feels like it’s falling apart.
Sometimes your relationship feels like it’s on fire. Maybe there’s been a huge fight, a betrayal, or the same painful cycle playing out over and over until it feels unbearable. In these moments, an intensive can be a stabilizing force – a way to pause the chaos, get support right away, and start finding your footing together again.
When you want to kickstart therapy.
You might not be in crisis, but you know things aren’t working as well as they could. Maybe you’re ready to make changes now rather than inching along week by week. An intensive can help you dive in, gain clarity about what’s happening, and build a strong foundation for ongoing therapy or for a new chapter in your relationship.
When one or both of you are unsure about staying together.
If you’re on the brink – wondering whether to stay or go – an intensive structured around Discernment Counseling can be immensely supportive. The Discernment Counseling process helps you both gain 1) CLARITY about what’s really happening in the relationship and 2) CONFIDENCE in choosing one of three paths forward: staying as you are (which rarely feels good), ending the relationship, or committing to working on the relationship in couples therapy. Whichever path you choose, you’ll do so with more understanding, honesty, and peace.
When you’re trying to heal from betrayal.
Affairs and other betrayals cut deep. The pain and rupture they create can feel impossible to come back from – and yet, I’ve seen couples move through this work and come out stronger and more honest than before. An intensive gives you the dedicated time, guidance, and safe space to begin that deep process of repair, and to understand what’s needed for trust to be rebuilt.
Relationship Intensive Schedule
All intensives are held online via secure video. They can be scheduled for 3 hours or 4.5 hours per day, and range from 1 to 4 days depending on your needs and goals. I customize the schedule with you to fit into your lives in the most supportive way – sometimes back-to-back days, sometimes spread out during a week to allow integration time between sessions.
Because these intensives are online, we will also plan for short breaks as needed to keep you feeling grounded and present throughout our time together.
If you would like to discuss what structure would best support your relationship right now, or if you’re unsure how many days or hours would be right for you, I’m happy to talk it through in a consultation call.
Relationship Intensive Fees & Payment
Please contact Director Katherine Waddell at 413-695-7193 to discuss fee structure.
**No insurances are accepted**
Payments can be made through the Couples Center of the Pioneer Valley via PayPal or credit card.
A deposit of half the cost of the intensive is due at the time of booking.
Next Steps
If this feels like the kind of focused, in-depth support you and your partner need right now, I invite you to reach out to our Director Katherine Waddell LMFT, at (413) 695-7193.
Intensives offer a dedicated space to really dive into what’s happening between you, uncover the underlying patterns, and begin creating meaningful shifts.
Together, we’ll work toward greater clarity, connection, and a clear sense of direction for your relationship moving forward.